Showing posts with label good ideas. Show all posts
Showing posts with label good ideas. Show all posts

September 18, 2015

What's This? Another Post? Weird.

This blog shifts a little, sort of like life... it started in college when I was writing mostly silly, humorous posts, then I abandoned it for a bit and started again by sort of trying to review subscription boxes, but I realized I'm way too lazy to keep up with that nonsense. My credit card is far larger than my interest in writing. Or something like that... sigh. Now I'm writing something personal with some other stuff! Yay for evolution. And to think, I was inspired after drinking some boxed "Delicious White" and reading my favorite new blog, Subscriptionista. Strangely enough, I found it when the creator of Eucopia was researching bloggers he should reach out to for his new box, and I was like dude I've never heard of any of these sites but that one site has cats and funny. Plus, while I love My Subscription Addiction, I really don't like how negative some comments get, and Subscriptionista commenters mostly manage to stay humorous. Basically, I want to be their friends [hands a glass of Delicious White to the internet, and invites the ladies outside for scones and sunshine].

Anyhoo, you know that feeling when you're unemployed and yet life still just speeds by and you're like... wtf did I just do with the last many weeks of my life?? and what should do I with this pile of woven wall hangings, half sewn t-shirt rugclay marbled bowls, and clay beads? I have that feeling almost every summer because I usually work in schools, and, in case you were unawares, non-teachers don't get paid whilst not working over the summer. I generally lay out in the sun, drink a nice hefewizen, and do some crafting or reading between napping with my tiny kitty [see figure 1]. However, for the last year I was finally employed at this job that I semi-loved, but was never confident enough to put it on my Google calendar for more than a month ahead.

Figure 1. Left: Bella thinks she is a parrot and spends much time sleeping on my shoulder/back; Top Right: Bella thinks she is a shirt; Middle Right: Bella hates wearing shirts; Bottom Right: Bella thinks she is more important than my homework.
My office job was somewhat sketchy, and I knew it wouldn't last long, but I was sad when it ended. Some days I felt all Veronica Marsy because I got to go dig through files, research employees, look at Pinterest, and then make phone calls to my associates. Okay, like a really boring Veronica Mars, but whatever. Anyway, a couple of months ago my boss decided to fill my position and the bookkeeper's position one day by just showing up with a new employee. It was awkward and a shitty thing for my boss to do. But, despite being replaced by a sexier older woman, I felt she was very capable and intelligent, and I actually wished we could have worked together.

Finally, I've found a new [and hopefully stable] job. I don't work well with other people, I've realized. I would like to though! I sometimes like people, but from what I've read about people with ADHD is that we sometimes scare people away. RAWR!! So, now I'll basically have 0 coworkers, unless you count when I call one of the four employees to get their timesheets in. However, I'm excited to start, and though it will be similar to what I was doing it sounds like I might also get to do some bathroom/kitchen designing if I want to! And I so want to.

I'm one of those people who wants to be a swing dancer, artist, writer, interior decorator, DIY blogger, standup comedienne, librarian, UX researcher/designer, and in my free time a person who sleeps inside of giant cozy cocoon-esque sweaters* whilst eating warm, buttery pumpkin bread with raisins, sipping on some sort of Bailey's chai cocoa latte concoction, and playing phone Scrabble while watching my favorite show of the moment [ie: Mindy Project, Witches of East End, Young & Hungry, Revenge, etc.]. However, then my anxiety/reality catches up to me and I'm like, yo your joints hurt too quickly to become a dancer, your art is sub-par, your stories generally involve everyone getting killed off because you can't end things, your decorating skills are college-thrift chic at best, you get anxiety-induced memory loss in front of people, and you're not a small blonde mom with time to hot glue amazing things together. BUT! I am getting my Master's in Information Science, which means I can definitely do the UX/librarian thing.

Finally, in addition to trying to get my life back on track by deep cleaning the kitchen at midnight, landing a job, cooking more, crafting more, and turning in homework on time, I would also like to write more. I write and exercise in my daydreams a lot, and if I only do those things for realsies, I'll be grand!

Blogging the depths of the abyss,
[a]


*In case you're like, I totally want to see what that giant cocoon sweater looks like, I actually drew a picture of my dream sweater a couple of years ago while I was substitute teaching. The students had to write some sort of poem, and I did the assignment with them and attached the drawing. Obviously the sweater would have a cup holder, a built in chair back, and a heating system, while still maintaining incredible softness.

January 29, 2015

Work Hard, Smile, Repeat

Job Hunting

Those have been my two least favorite words since... forever. I'm picky. I'm not good at anything STEM related, so I can't find one of those jobs where I get to quietly research and type stuff by myself. I get distracted easily, and like wandering off. I don't really pay attention to people when they're telling me directions, and often have to ask for a repeat 2-4 times. Basically I have ADHD and no one believes me because I'm not an 8 year old boy. None of those are things I can tell perspective employers while I am replying to the silly "Strengths/Weaknesses" question.

While job hunting, I noticed that I would roll my eyes or groan while reading job descriptions. So, I thought I would just share a few phrases that make me cringe when I am looking at jobs:

  • "10 or more years of experience" 
    • I am barely old enough to have that much experience in anything. I call age discrimination!
  • "Are you passionate about customer service?" 
    • No... no one is. They're lying if they say they are. We just want a job, please and thanks!
  • "Four-year college degree or 15 years of proven successful business experience." 
    • I mean, I may have gotten a C in Prob and Stats, but that's not even close to equivalent.
  • "Design and maintain systems to ensure Executive Director works as effectively and efficiently as possible"
    • My response to said director: "Hey, I brought you a capybarra and a lime popsicle! But first, you have to complete the labyrinth I tossed your paycheck into. Work HARDER or Hoggle will pee on you!"


Blogging the depths of the abyss,
[a]

January 24, 2015

Feathered Family

Recently my sister did a blood test to see where our parents' ancestors were from. I also decided to look into our history, so I looked up my family tree. Not that I want to regurgitate all these pellets of history on you, but what I found really turned heads! I always knew I was a night owl, but it seems many of my mousey relatives were as well. I was curious hooo we got such great hooters and wide eyes, and there it all was on the geneowlogy site.

Blogging the depths of the abyss,
[a]

May 20, 2013

50 Ways to Lose Your Roomie [pt II]

I'm definitely not OCD, but I do not appreciate my things being moved. I don't like dishes, socks, boyfriends, etc. that aren't mine appearing in my room, trash sorted into the wrong bins [it seems so easy, yet people just don't care], or my clothes being worn.

The last one in particular. My clothes stay looking nice because I don't A. make a mess like a 3 year old, B. sweat profusely, or C. wash my clothes excessively [because of the lack of A and B]. In my imagination, the day my clothes are borrowed happens to be the day they get the rib dinner with extra sauce. No napkins. Why? Well, because they've got this new skirt/napkin.

One could just ask the purloiner to stop, but where's the fun in that? Instead, I considered alternative routes to recommend you go down in order to deter a roommate, parent, sibling, or friend from wearing your clothing.

1. Spray everything with skunk scent.
Pros Your roomie will no longer want to borrow anything because all of your clothing [and probably your entire place] will stink the stench of a thousand deaths.
Cons No one will want to come near you. Ever.

2. Buy clothing inappropriate for your roomie's body type OR pieces you've heard them express disdain for.
Pros The clothing-snatcher might take a piece or two, but you no longer care because your closet is full of awful trash.
Cons You'll probably look awful in your new wardrobe.

3. Start borrowing all of their clothing. Think large-scale: excessive layering, use the living room to create Fort Vestments, stuff a new mattress, or pillows, blankets, and sheets made from clothes. Then spill a lot of pickled beet juice and tuna on the layers.
Pros You can hint or suggest that it might be best if neither of you borrowed the other's clothing to prevent further spillage or clothing miss-use. After all, it's easier to just not borrow than it is to remember silly guidelines such as not sewing padded bras together to make an amazing face-cupping pillow.
Cons None. Unless your roomie is crazy and doesn't care that you ruined all of their clothes!

Blogging the depths of the abyss, 
[a]