Adult Sleepover

As a child, I am sure most of you entertained other prepubescents in your domicile. By that I mean, had a slumber party or sleepover.

Don't you miss them?

I do.

They didn't make these for your cat to see!

Why isn't it socially acceptable for adults to have nonsexual sleepovers? Here, I'll show you how to have one as an adult:

• Make a list of 2-6 friends who won't trash your place or stick jelly beans up your nose.
• Send out invitations, instructing your pals to bring their sleeping bags [because you're still too poor to buy more than three blankets and a couch].
• Procure wine, mini quiches, 8 lbs of super butter popcorn, a manicure set, romantic comedies, and some video games.
• Clean your house.
• Let your friends partake in your wine, quiches, popcorn, fancy nails, shitty movies, and video games.
• Don't make out with them.
  

Remember, you don't have to be drunk or horny to stay at a friend's house! Call your friends today!

Blogging the depths of the abyss,
[a]